Love is the outcome...

A conversation tonight shed some light to the past few days of my life. Upon explaining my sleep deprivation situation in the past few days my dear friend Winnie stated to me this. “Fasting from sleep…awakened to God” “Its pretty beautiful actually…very few people sacrifice for the King.”


So whats been going on. Well two nights ago I didn’t sleep. I kinda felt it was due to stressful reasons, to news I had received that I did not want to hear nor accept a possibility of. But laying in my bed these thoughts and images kept popping into my head…with this feeling that I just needed to pray. Pray….Pray…Pray. So 8am rolls around…and Im awake…I then go through my day…slightly agitated that I was awake all night…still thinking this has to do with the stressful news I was told the day before. Classes end…Im exhausted….and I go to my dorm, attempt to fall asleep…and fail. Um hello…Ive been awake for way to long….I need rest.

So Im sitting at my computer….and it hits me…start reading scripture….start writing. So I did…and about 5 songs worth of lyrics sprouted. Course they arnt what we would generally like to sing….but then I started writing a prayer…about everything I had read….about falling in love, falling towards Love, either way just falling.

That’s exactly what I was doing…falling in Love all over again with who God is…and what Christ did for us….the beauty of a sacrifice so perfect it saved my life. Because I accepted Christ…I died with Him on the Cross…to live with Him now. I can fall for Him because He will catch me. Sing, because no matter the note He will hear and love it. And that Love I can give out…praise…sing…worship…

After all I know/how could I not love?

Sleep left me because I needed to be awakened to something so important…and it could not wait. I do not want to make God ever wait for me. And I already have…

After a nights sleep again…I can honestly say…He is my strength, my song, my hope, and I will rest in Him before putting so much value on sleep again. If I had not stayed awake…taken that time…Im not sure I would have listened.

If he says go….will you go?

If he says don’t be afraid…will you still fear?

If he says forgive…will you say no?

If he says love…will you continue to hate?

If he says rest in me only for this time….will you find rest in other means?

Love is the outcome/and right now/nothing else matters….

How many times to we just say no….go on with our days…act like nothings wrong…but really we need to break….to listen. What will it take for God to break us? To just give it all to Him to use…giving our lives….Just Dying to Live.